Thursday, June 27, 2013

Hernia Be Gone

We awoke a little early today so that we could get the surgicenter on time for Sully's surgery to have his two epi-gastric hernias repaired.  I was happy that we had the first appointment of the day because he wasn't allowed to eat or drink anything this morning.  Sully is used to having a big mug of milk every morning so I knew there would only be a small window of time before he really started missing it and began screaming and crying.  Things actually went really smoothly.  We took him straight from the crib to the car.  Monkey came along too.

Within just a few minutes we were in the exam room, had a meeting with the nurse, the surgeon, and the anesthesiologist.  We changed him into special surgery pj's and then the nurse gave him a little something to help relax him.  For the most part, he remained in good spirits and when the nurse came to take him to the operating room he cried but only a little bit.  I was happy that I didn't have to see them put the IV in.

They had told us that the surgery, including all the prep time in the OR, would take about an hour.  We were only in the waiting room maybe a half an hour when the surgeon came out to say everything had gone well.  He made one, small incision right in between his two hernias and felt that both were repaired well.  They required a few stitches, which will scar over and stop the hernias from reappearing, so we will be able to feel those little bumps under his skin still but it will be from scar tissue and not his organs bulging through the fascia.  The surgeon did say though that there was some weakness around where he made the incision and so we might see more hernias develop as he grows up.

We couldn't go back and see him until he woke up on his own but once he had we went back and snuggled with him.  He was upset over the pulse monitor on his big toe and the IV in his foot but with a little help from Super Why, he was distracted enough to stop noticing them.  He drank a little water and then the nurse came and took out his IV and we were ready to go home.  He looked a little drugged, but overall, was acting pretty  normal.

On the way home we were all starving so we stopped to have a late breakfast.  Sully gulped down a cup of milk and devoured a pancake.  Once home he took a nap and woke up normal as ever.  He can't take a bath for a few days but other than that, he's allowed to play as much as he's comfortable with.  The surgeon said that little kids have an amazing ability to self-limit, unlike many adults who don't feel well but push on with things.  The only thing I'm a little concerned about is that he seems very aware of the bandage on his chest and keeps trying to touch it.  Hopefully after today he will barely even notice it so that five days from now when I can take it off it's no big deal at all.

I'm relieved that it's over and happy everything went so well. 

Sunday, June 23, 2013

Lettuce Eat!

Last night the husband grilled out steak, potatoes and asparagus.  Tonight, we're planning on using some of the leftover steak in salads.  Our lettuce crop has become pretty abundant so we're going to enjoying it.

This year I added two more raised beds and planted far more pepper and lettuce than I have in years past.  Tomatoes take up one entire bed, peppers and beans another and the middle has lettuce and onions.  In a bag to the side I am trying potatoes this year.  We'll see how that goes.

These were the beds in May.

And now, thanks to all the rain we've had recently, they are really getting going.

Lettuce!  Romaine, Red Leaf and Butter.

And finally, dinner while Mare Bear chills on the play mat.

Tuesday, June 18, 2013

Two Weeks Ago, One Week Ago, Years Ago

It seems every time things seem to be slowing back down and returning to normal something happens.  Perhaps it would be easier to assume that something is more likely to go wrong than to assume that things will all be whatever I consider to be normal.

Two weeks ago I got the results from my re-pap.  It was another good news/bad news result.  The good news is that the hpv portion of the test came back negative.  The bad news portion is that there are still some cell abnormalities.  There are quite a few different overall types of abnormalities but so as not to bore anyone basically there's the this looks strange but we don't know why and chances are it's no big deal type and then there's this looks very  not normal and we're guessing it could be pre-cancerous so you need further evaluation.  Thankfully, this time mine falls into the strange but not so strange I should panic type.  My doctor and I are hopeful that the slight changes are really just the result of my cervix still healing.  I am supposed to report back for another pap in four months.

One week ago I was right where I am now, sitting at home trying to relax after a day of work, except that last week my left shoulder blade, shoulder and upper arm were so sore I was beginning to wonder if I wasn't having a heart attack.  There was no specific incident that seemed to cause the pain.  It felt a tiny bit sore Sunday afternoon, sore enough on Monday that I took some Advil but then so much worse Tuesday that the Advil just laughed at me so I stepped it up to a leftover Vicodin which also did nothing.  After much googling, much of which included instructing me to call 911 immediately, I decided that I was not having a heart attack and that it was much more likely that I just pulled a muscle or pinched a nerve. Perhaps my arm was finally giving out after spending the last six years holding up babies and toddlers.  No matter what the cause, I was in a ton of pain so I headed out to the urgent care.  Many naproxens, percocets, ice packs, doctor visits, x-rays and finally a cortisone shot later, it is finally starting to feel a little bit better.  It's been a long week and probably even longer for the husband who has been in charge of all four kids all week since I have been unable to lift the baby or Sully or do much else.

Three years ago I would have been just recovering from my second miscarriage while also mourning the due date from my first miscarriage.  Each year those dates are a little easier to take.  Time may not heal all wounds but it definitely softens them.  The place I'm in now is a little odd though as I do still feel the pain of those losses and I mourn my two little lost babies and yet I'm not sure many people understand that.  I think most people who know us and know about our losses feel that having Sully and Maren has sort of taken care of things, as though children are replaceable.  I lost a little boy and then a little girl; then I gave birth to a live baby boy and a live baby girl so it's all equal now, right?  Not to me it's not but it's a paradox of sorts.  I wish I could have known those babies, raised them and watched them grow and yet had that happened I never would have had Sully and Maren and knowing and loving them the way I do now there's no way for me to say I would trade that for anything different than exactly what brought them to me.  I guess in the end it seems to be an issue I frequently have, I want it all.

Right now this is my all.  I can't believe my in-laws got a picture of all four of them actually looking at the camera. 

Sunday, June 2, 2013


Maren was baptized today.  She was a champ and didn't cry at all, not even while having water poured over her head and getting the oil on her forehead.  It always amazes me how even as a somewhat lapsed Catholic, I do still really enjoy the ceremony and traditions of the Church.  Maren really enjoyed gnawing on her bunny.