Sunday, October 16, 2011

And So it Goes

This week I turned 40. Honestly, in my head I am still right around 30, although my body feels like it's about 60. Forty rewarded me by having my back go out while putting the baby down in his crib. Very nice. I guess I just don't feel like I can have have a newborn and be 40. I also feel as though at 40 my life should be figured out and it's anything but. Yes, I have a career, a house, three kids, a dog and a cat but I have no big retirement account, only a very small college fund for the kids and I just have this feeling that I'm not yet completely settled. Maybe it's because we still don't know if we're done having children or maybe it's because the husband is still in graduate school or maybe it's just not wanting to acknowledge that there are things we really need to get working on - saving for retirement being just one example.

Also in a sure sign that time is passing, on Tuesday I return to work full-time. I scheduled myself with some long weekends for the first two weeks in an attempt to ease myself back into the groove of things. I enjoy working so actually doing the work isn't a big deal. However, getting three kids up and out the door two days a week when the husband works earlier than me will be hectic, as will going back to not getting home until sometimes between five and six and trying to figure out how to get everything that needs to get done, done before the kids need to be in bed. Also, I will really miss picking SB up from school. It's so nice to see him coming running out yelling "Mommy" and then giving me a giant hug. I've also had a lot of fun taking the kids on outings to places that we normally wouldn't go to on a weekend. One more big thing is just the flexibility I have right now to just run downstairs and throw in some laundry or to do the dishes as they get dirty so I never come home to a sink full of dirty dishes or to run an errand when there aren't as many people in the stores.

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